Putting life in order…

Sometimes, life gets a little disorganized. You can’t find your keys, you forget it’s trash-day, you have to look up the address of a friend you visit on a regular basis – go figure!?!

If you have kids, life is frequently disorganized (who has kids that put things where they belong?) and, trust me, if a family member has dementia, it is a very similar path – coffee cups in the refrigerator, sunglasses left on the couch, pajamas discarded on the bathroom floor. So, you’re always picking up and putting away – re-creating order, as I call this activity in my house.

Photo of a kitchen sink full of dishes.
When you’re a caregiver, and someone else’s wellbeing rests on your shoulders, you not only need to keep up with the day-to-day housekeeping chores; you have to dig a little deeper and look at bigger issues that need to be addressed. On occasion, we need to act on a larger scale regarding this work of Putting Life in Order. Here’s what I mean. . .
This summer it is time for me to do several things that will Put Life in Order on that larger scale for my household, such as:
  • It’s time to update my WILL (yep, written at least 10 years ago, things have changed, my priorities have shifted and it’s time to revise that essential document!)
  • I need to update my EOL notebook (in my house, that’s the RED notebook) that spells out for my executor all the details of my personal and financial situation, so his work will be easier to manage.
  • I’m financing home repairs (this building is, after all, 20 years old now) so over the last few years and certainly this summer, I’m investing in structural elements that simply need to be replaced!
There’s no getting around it, you can put things off for a while, but sooner or later, you have to Put Life in Order, whether you enjoy that task or not!
The danger lies in persistent avoidance. Many of us put off what we think of as difficult, challenging or onerous tasks. Things like writing or updating that advance-directive for healthcare, assuring that we have our DPOA (Durable Power of Attorney) in place for ourselves and/or for others in our care are important tasks. Managing credit accounts (so that they don’t become a target for identity theft) can be another bothersome chore. While it wouldn’t seem like it, these things are ALL self-care!
They fall into the big bucket of self-care because they keep your FINANCIAL house in order and protect you and your loved ones from the common pitfalls of today’s complex, legally constrained environment. These decisions reflect your values and your careful management of not only your life’s savings, but also your freedom to choose what’s next in life.
It can be daunting to look at these kinds of matters head-on. Most of us have some aversion to getting a part of this life-management organized. For some it is the financial conversations that need to be had. For others it may be a reluctance to talk about the inevitability of death. And for many, it is just the unpleasantness of coming to terms with the harsh realities of life, when we’d rather act like we’re on vacation. But we’re not.
What do you find yourself avoiding that continues to call for your attention? What weighs on your consciousness reminding you that there’s work to be done? Sooner or later each of us finds ourselves needing to put life in order and get on with even the most challenging chores of adulting.
I’m reminded of the saying: What we resist persists. Sometimes it’s good to have a helper that can gently encourage you to accomplish the difficult things in life. Let me know if I can help! That’s what a coach is for, to go with you through the hard places, so you can live the life you love!
Self-care is every conscious action you take that feeds your soul, nourishes your body, nurtures your spirit, or replenishes your relationship with yourself!
They fall into the big bucket of self-care because they keep your FINANCIAL house in order and protect you and your loved ones from the common pitfalls of today’s complex, legally constrained environment. These decisions reflect your values and your careful management of not only your life’s savings, but also your freedom to choose what’s next in life.
 

It can be daunting to look at these kinds of matters head-on. Most of us have some aversion to getting a part of this life-management organized. For some it is the financial conversations that need to be had. For others it may be a reluctance to talk about the inevitability of death. And for many, it is just the unpleasantness of coming to terms with the harsh realities of life, when we’d rather act like we’re on vacation. But we’re not.

What do you find yourself avoiding that continues to call for your attention? What weighs on your consciousness reminding you that there’s work to be done? Sooner or later each of us finds ourselves needing to put life in order and get on with even the most challenging chores of adulting.

I’m reminded of the saying: What we resist persists. Sometimes it’s good to have a helper that can gently encourage you to accomplish the difficult things in life. Let me know if I can help! That’s what a coach is for, to go with you through the hard places, so you can live the life you love!

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About Paula

I help other caregivers – both professionals and family caregivers – acknowledge their pain and learn to practice the many small skills of self-care that can sustain them through the challenges of wholeheartedly caring for others.

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How Can I Help You?

Through Co-Create 4 Life, you will learn a range of well-being strategies from skillfully implementing self-care to holistic approaches to well-being, rebuilding resilience, and battling burnout. Book a free consultation call today to discuss your options.

How Can I Help You?

Through Co-Create 4 Life, you will learn a range of well-being strategies from skillfully implementing self-care to holistic approaches to well-being, rebuilding resilience, and battling burnout. Book a free consultation call today to discuss your options.